Today is my beloved grandmom’s 100th birthday. So right now, when this article is posted, I’m in Vejle to her 100th birthday celebration.
In honour of Farmor (Danish for paternal grandmom), I want to write an article dedicated to her.
Farmor was special in many ways, but she hid it very well. She was a profound psychic and clairvoyant – she always told THEY BEST ghost stories. Her ghost stories were always first-hand experiences. Talking with dead people has never been my jam, but I love listening to peoples experiences.
“… People Won’t Understand Anyway!”
You probably can imagine growing up as a psychic and clairvoyant in an okay-large city in the 1920-40s might not be the easiest thing. Farmor have always strongly believed to keep our spirituality and abilities within the house’s four walls “… because people won’t understand anyway!” That statement alone makes it very clear to me that it wasn’t easy to be her and have her strong and powerful abilities. No doubt she had been hurt and mistreated because of her spirituality. Still, she had never shut her abilities down or blocked the communication from the spiritual realm out.
In my family, spirituality has never been considered as a religion or belief system… and we have never been members of the New Age community. My Farmor was Christian and a member of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Denmark. That said, going to church every Sunday isn’t something we ever had practised. But she had a tiny cross on the wall next to her bed. Spirituality and abilities are just as natural for us as breathing. It’s a part of our everyday life.
My Guardian Human.
My relationship with Farmor has always been very special. I’ve always called her my Guardian Human – just like humans have Guardian Angels, Farmor was my Guardian Human. Even though she never mentioned it with words, I know Farmor knew my true identity the moment she holds me in her arms for the first time.
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She always encouraged me to stay true to my truth, wisdom, abilities, and powers.
She made a huge effort to teach me how to control my anger and rage. Sometimes it felt like I wasn’t allowed to express those emotions, and she wouldn’t let me know why. “It isn’t the proper thing to do, Sabrina!” she said. I now understand why she was so much on my neck about controlling my anger… when I get angry, my energy and fire shoots fireballs like a firework. It’s too dangerous!
I have learned my lesson after some accidents and understand now why Farmor wanted me to count down from 10 and channel my anger into safer outlets, like writing, dancing, or drawing.
THANKFULLY, it takes a lot before I get angry… I can pull up with a lot of shit before I’m turning red. I want to see the good in everyone, and I want to give people the opportunity to improve themselves. But at some point, enough is enough.
“… As a Real Lady!”
In many ways, I was the daughter my Farmor never got herself. So when I started to hit puberty, she slowly took over my manners to make sure I became “a real Lady!” It bugged the bejeezus out of me, but I also knew that she meant well. Because she was such a profound psychic and clairvoyant, I trust that she had a very good reason to keep educating me in good manners, how to sit, how to speak, when to speak, how to dress, how to carry myself, how to keep my head high no matter what, and how to deal with difficult situations while never losing face.
I’m not kidding… still, to this day today, I always have her in my right ear if I’m doing or saying something she disapproves of.
“Sabrina, that is not how a Real Lady is talking!”
“Sabrina, that is not how a Real Lady sit! Put those legs down!”
“Sabrina, that is not how a Real Lady sit! Keep those legs closed!”
“Sabrina, how is it you’re talking?!”
“Sabrina, a Real Lady won’t dress like that!”
“Sabrina, that is not how a Real Lady behave!”
… you get the picture! – and always with a lot of disappointment in her voice.
Oh, oh, oh – the best one “A’MEN SABRINA DOG!” (translated: Oh dear Lord, Sabrina!) also with a shit-ton of contempt in her voice. I tell you, that tone of disappointment and contempt has ALWAYS been waaaaaay more effective than my mother’s beating. Farmor knew how she should get me to obey 😂🤣
I’m sure you already have discovered, I’m not always talking or speaking like a “Real Lady” – 1) because we don’t live in 1890 anymore, and 2) because I don’t like to be tied down. I like my freedom. There is a time and space for everything!
Lady-Like behaviour is perfect in social events and when I need to put on my Boss Lady stilettos. But in everyday life… Nah, too restrictive. So, I just have to live with having her in my right ear all the time and feel her disappointment in me. 😂🙈😇
Truth to be told, I’m actually grateful that she pushed me so hard to get good manners and become a little Lady. Because of her, I know I can manage myself quite well in pretty much any social setting. It adds confidence!
Be a Strong Woman.
While Farmor was super old-school when it comes to the manners of a young lady, and she was so careful about letting others know about her spiritual abilities, she is one of the strongest women I ever had known.
I won’t go into details about why she needed to be so strong since that’s a private matter. I’m just saying that I don’t envy parts of her life, and I’m very much aware of not have that happen to me.
Farmor was the perfect example of being a classic Lady with high standards and an eye for quality. She was highly spiritual, practising her abilities, and making her family feel comfortable with their abilities.
She raised two boys on her own, was a seamstress, run her own textile shop, and taught young girls how to sew in after school classes. Be a female shop owner in the 1950-70s is pretty badass if you ask me.
Raise Your Standards, and the Universe Will Meet You There.
Farmor always believed in be respectful to yourself and others! Have standards, prioritise quality, and never lose face no matter what you’re going through. As I said, there is a time and place for everything. If you need to cry and get your emotions out, then do it at home when you’re surrounded by your loved ones.
I strongly believe my contempt for victim mentality comes from her. It’s okay to struggle and feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, but throw a pity party and complain about how hard everything is… what would that solve?
“Always carry yourself with pride, Sabrina! The world doesn’t need to see when you struggle.”
Another thing I 100% have from Farmor is my independence and assertiveness.
I have standards:
If something is under my standard or dignity, I’m not getting involved.
If I’m not passionate and genuinely burning (*hint*Seraph*hint*) for something, it ain’t gonna happen!
If people don’t treat me with respect and dignity, I’m out!
I don’t get angry or mad with people (unless I reach the “enough is enough” point) – I just take notice. If their bullshit turns out to be a pattern, I will slowly remove myself from the person.
I’m very much like Farmor in those things.
However, I’m way more open about things than Farmor ever was. Part of it is time has changed and what we do is more socially acceptable.
But another part of it, and I think this the big one, I don’t care about what people are saying or thinking about me and what I’m doing. I don’t need anyone’s approval or validation. This comes from me being a Seraph and never exposed to fear, hate, anxiety, and pain before I incarnated into this human body.
My Farmor, on the other hand, is a VERY old soul and has been around the block multiple times. She is the definition of the wise, old lady! She was a re-re-re-re-reincarnation of a sorceress with royal blood. We all know what happens to wise ones and people with abilities throughout human history – and your soul will remember all those horrible things that happened to you back then. Suppose you’re afraid of getting out of the spiritual closet. In that case, the key to your fear most likely lies in something truly terrible that happened to you in a previous lifetime.
My wish for you is for you to find the courage to get out of the spiritual closet and start practising your abilities and powers without fearing what everyone else would react. We are finally stepping into a time where it’s safe to be true to yourself about who you really are.