Relationships can be some of the most challenging things in this world. I don’t think there ever has been nor will be a relationship that is 100% rainbows and sunshine all the time. There will always be something… but even the most difficult and pain-in-the-butt relationships can be a blessing in disguise if you’re willing to look at them that way.
In this article, I’m not just talking about romantic relationships – I’m talking about all the relationships in your life; lovers, friendships, family, old classmates, co-workers, even the relationship with your local checkout assistant.
Reason #1 – Everyone Comes Into Your Life for a Reason.
You might argue with this, but nothing happens as a coincidence, even when it doesn’t seem like it.
Every person you meet on your way is placed in your life at that time and place for a reason.
The reason can be major or tiny. The relationship can be lifelong or just for a short second. But everyone comes into your life for a reason and shapes it in a unique way. Everyone has some sort of influence on your life, even strangers on social media or characters in a movie.
Reason #2 – Everyone Can Teach You Something About Yourself.
The major reason why someone comes into your life is that the person (or character) is here to teach you something about yourself. It can be short-term or long-term. The longer your relationship with someone is, the more they have to teach you about yourself. That’s why some of the most challenging relationships we have are the ones we have with our family.
Some of the most common lessons any of your relationships can teach you are:
- Being Non-Judgemental
Reason #3 – You’re Giving Others an Opportunity for Growth.
Just like those relationships are here to teach you something about yourself, they are here to do the same for the other person.
Any relationship is an opportunity for growth for anyone involved!
However, that doesn’t mean that the lesson will be the same for both involved.
One relationship may hold a lesson for you in letting go of being judgmental, while the same relationship may hold a lesson for the other person to be more assertive. Another relationship may hold a lesson for you in forgiveness, while the same relationship is here to teach the other person about becoming a nicer person.
Reason #4 – Every Relationship Helps You Practice Forgiveness.
One of the biggest lessons in every relationship is forgiveness. I don’t think there ever existed one relationship where forgiveness wasn’t needed. You will screw up, and others will screw up. You will need to forgive others, just like you will need others to forgive you.
Forgiveness is rarely about the other person! You need to forgive the other person for setting yourself free from whatever happened. Just as you need to forgive yourself when you eff up.
Forgiveness is about setting yourself and the other person free from whatever happened. To close the chapter and move on.
The longer you’re holding on to what happened, the longer it will be a burden in your life.
Asking for forgiveness from others can be a big help to set yourself free. It’s important to apologise when you mess up or go too far – it’s an act of acknowledging what you did and taking responsibility for whatever pain it might have caused the other person. In most cases, saying “I’m so sorry, can you forgive me?” is the most mature thing to do. It shows empathy and responsibility.
When it comes to other people, you can’t expect someone to apologise to you! You’re not the boss over others’ decisions, and an apology is a decision! – and one that should come from the heart. It can turn into a major fight if you expect an apology from someone who doesn’t think they have done anything wrong.
You don’t need an apology from the other person in order to forgive them. It would be a nice thing for sure, but you can not expect it to happen. Thankfully, you don’t need someone’s apology to forgive them! I have a mantra that saves my sanity day after day when it comes to people who hurt me or are jerks.
“EVERYONE DOES THE VERY BEST THEY CAN WITH THE KNOWLEDGE AND EXPERIENCE THEY HAVE AT THE MOMENT. SOME PEOPLE JUST DON’T KNOW ANY BETTER… AND SOME PEOPLE JUST NEVER LEARNS. THAT IS OKAY! I’M SURRENDERING THIS AND MOVING ONE!”
This mantra will set you free immediately!
It works like magic if you’re capable of letting go of the grudge and moving on. After you have forgiven them, you can always decide if you want to keep someone in your life who doesn’t have the courtesy to apologise when they have hurt you.
Reason #5 – Every Relationship Gives You the Opportunity to Practise Being Non-Judgmental.
Everyone hates when someone is judging them, yet still, they love to judge others. There is a reason why people love reading the tabloids and watching reality tv. We are judging others to feel better about ourselves. We seek others’ validation and approval (judgement) to have them telling us how wonderful, sweet, loyal, smart, intelligent, etc., we are.
Judgement is an act of our ego, our fear-based mind!
The ego is constantly insecure about itself, so it pulls out these random acts of judgement to make us feel better about ourselves. The people who are the most judgmental are, in fact, the people who are most insecure about themselves. People who are living in peace with themselves and are confident in who they are don’t have any need to talk shit or judge anyone. They just move on with their lives if they disagree with someone.
We all have people in our lives who are judgmental toward us. It would seem like everyone has some sort of opinion about us and how we should live our lives.
Meanwhile, we, too, are inclined to judge others and have opinions about how they should live their life. Before you start to argue with that statement, I just want to ask you to remember the last time you wanted to help someone because you knew what would make them happier or wanted to solve their mess for them?
You are a Lightworker, which means you are very inclined to turn everyone into your personal fix-up project.
Every time you think someone needs to be fixed or improved, you’re judging the person.
It’s fine as long as you’re aware of it, and you can shift from “I need to fix the person”-mode to “I’m going to support and hold the person’s hand while they make the change themselves”-mode.
Our job is not to fix anyone – our job is to provide support and comfort while they’re on their journey. There is a beautiful lesson in being humble, hidden in knowing when to interfere and knowing when to step back and just holding someone’s hand.
I want to hear from you!
Which of these lessons did you need to hear the most?
Let me know in the comments in the Insta post below 👇🏻
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