It’s no secret. I think social media is Toxic and Unhealthy for a person’s mental Well-Being.

To be fully honest, I never got back to social media in the same way as before I left. I was pretty much off social media the most of 2018, then a short period in 2019, and almost gone for the entire of 2020. Truth be told, until 2018, I was kind of addicted to social media. I checked my phone every 3rd second and kept a close eye on how many likes, comments, and followers I had. When I created content, I created it to get as many likes as possible and get new followers. I was all about the numbers.

In 2018, I was recovering from stress and an anxiety disorder I got in 2016, where I hit the wall with 3000 km/h. I was well aware that my obsessive use of social media was one of the reasons why I crashed. But, like any other addiction, one thing is to be aware of the problem; another thing is to be ready to do something about it.

It took me a while before I was ready to take a cold turkey, delete all the social media apps on my iPhone and iPad, and not be tempted to log in from my computer. The first month was the worst, but after that, it became easier.

I decided to release this Guide for FREE! – Because I believe it’s heavily important to shine a light on this Unhealthy approach to social media. Your Mental Health will ALWAYS be more important than how many followers you have!

So, let’s get started 🌟

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Unfortunately, we live in a World where everyone seems obsessed with the number of followers they have. It’s all about the likes, the comments, the shares, and the followers. But let me tell you something – those numbers are just that, numbers. What truly matters is the quality of the connections you build and the impact you make.

If you’re here, reading this guide, it’s because you’ve realised that there’s something more important than being followed: becoming a Leader and surrounding yourself with Leaders.

So, let’s dive deep into why you should stop chasing followers and start searching for Leaders. Trust me, your life is about to get a lot more fulfilling.

#1 – The Power of Influence Over Popularity

First things first, let’s talk about Influence versus Popularity. Popularity is often superficial. It’s the number of people who know your name, but not necessarily your story. Influence, on the other hand, is the ability to inspire, uplift, and drive positive change in others.

If you’re constantly chasing followers, you’re playing a numbers game that leaves you feeling empty.

But if you Focus on becoming a Leader and connecting with other Leaders, you’re Cultivating Relationships that are based on Mutual Growth, Respect, and Empowerment.

What Does It Mean to Be a Leader?

Being a Leader isn’t about holding a title or being in a position of Power. It’s about living Authentically, with Purpose, and with a Commitment to making the World a Better Place.

Leaders inspire others through their Actions, their Integrity, and their Willingness to stand up for what they believe in, even when it’s not Popular. They’re not afraid to be vulnerable, to show their true selves, and to admit when they’re wrong. They lead by example, not by demanding Followers.

For those of us who have been Hurt, Betrayed, or Manipulated by Toxic People and Narcissists, the idea of Leadership might seem intimidating. You might think, “Who am I to lead?” But let me remind you – your Experiences, your Pain, and your Resilience are exactly what makes you a Powerful Leader. You’ve walked through fire and finally come out the other side stronger. Now, it’s time to use that strength to guide others.

#2 – Why Followers Won’t Bring You Fulfilment

Let’s be real – having a large following might give you a temporary Ego Boost, but it won’t bring you lasting Happiness or Fulfilment. It’s easy to get caught up in the Validation that comes with likes and comments, but these are fleeting. They don’t feed your Soul; they just scratch an itch that keeps coming back.

Followers, in the traditional sense, are not going to save you from your inner pain and suffering. They’re not going to help you Heal, they’re not going to Manifest your Desires, and they’re certainly not going to help you Cultivate the Relationships you deeply crave.

I get it – Having followers feels good. It’s Validation, it’s Attention, it’s a sign that people “like” you. But let’s be real: How many of those followers are Truly Invested in Your Well-Being? Hate to break the news, but it’s a Lot Fewer than you might think. Why? Because people are busy Dealing with their own Pain and Challenges.

The truth is, that chasing followers is a never-ending race with no finish line. You’ll always want more, and you’ll always feel like you’re not enough.

When you’ve been through the Emotional and Psychological Wringer – whether it’s from Narcissistic Abuse, Toxic Relationships, or Years of Battling Self-Doubt – you are not in a place where Shallow Validation is going to cut it. You need people who have Walked the path before you, who understand how it is, and who can Guide you through the Darkness into a Space of Light, Love and Empowerment.

The Illusion of Control

When you’re Focused on gaining followers, you’re actually giving away your Power. You’re allowing your Self-Worth to be dictated by the opinions of others, most of whom don’t even know you. You’re constantly seeking external Validation instead of finding it within yourself.

This creates an Unhealthy Cycle where you feel like you’re only as good as the number of people following you. It can put you in a space, where you take it Personally when someone unfollows you, wondering what you did wrong. But the reality is, you have no control over other people’s Actions Or opinions. The only thing you can control is yourself – your Thoughts, your Actions, and your Mindset.

#3 – The Importance of Surrounding Yourself with Leaders

If you want to Grow, Evolve, and Manifest the life you Desire, you need to surround yourself with people who Challenge you, Inspire you, and hold you Accountable. These people are Leaders – people who are not afraid to Step Up, Speak Out, and Take Action.

When you’re surrounded by Leaders, you’re constantly being pushed to be your best self. They won’t let you settle for mediocrity, and they’ll Support you in your journey toward Greatness.

What Makes a True Leader?

A true Leader is someone who lifts others up, who sees Potential in everyone, and who isn’t afraid to share their Wisdom and Experiences.

They don’t just talk the talk; they walk the walk.

They are resilient, compassionate, and driven by a sense of Purpose that goes beyond their own success.

Leaders are not perfect – they make mistakes, they have fears, and they face challenges just like everyone else. But what sets them apart is their Willingness to Learn, Grow, and Keep Moving Forward.

Why You Need Leaders in Your Life

Leaders inspire you to Be More, Do More, and Achieve More. They provide Guidance, Wisdom, and Support when you need it most. They Challenge you to Step Out of your Comfort Zone, to Face your Fears, and to Take Risks.

Leaders don’t sugarcoat things – They Tell you the Truth, even when it’s hard to hear because They Want you to Succeed. They Believe in You, often More than You Believe in Yourself, and They Push you to Reach your Full Potential.

If you’ve Experienced Narcissistic Abuse or have been Surrounded by Toxic People, you know how damaging it can be to your Self-Esteem and Confidence. Narcissists Drain Your Energy, Undermine Your Sense of Self-Worth, and Make You Doubt Your Abilities. That’s why it’s crucial to distance yourself from these Energy Vampires and instead, align yourself with Leaders who will help you Heal, Grow, and Thrive.

#4 – How to Identify and Connect with Leaders

Now that you understand the Importance of seeking out Leaders, the next step is to find them. But how do you identify true Leaders in a World where Everyone seems to be Pretending to be Someone they’re not?

Signs of a True Leader

• Authenticity: A true Leader is someone who is Authentic, who shows up as their real, unfiltered self. They’re not interested in projecting an image of perfection; instead, they’re Committed to being Honest, Vulnerable, and Open about Their own Struggles, Mistakes, and Triumphs.
• Integrity: A Leader is someone who stays True to their Values, even when it’s difficult. They are Real, Reliable, and Trustworthy.
• Empathy: Leaders have a Deep Understanding of others’ Emotions and Perspectives. They listen without Judgment and offer Support without Expecting anything in return.
• Vision: Leaders have a clear sense of Purpose and Direction. They know where they’re going and why, and they Inspire others to follow that path.
• Courage: Leaders are not afraid to Take Risks, Speak Their Truth, and Stand Up for what They Believe in, even in the Face of Opposition.
• Humility: True Leaders don’t need to Boast or Seek Validation. They are Confident in their Abilities but Remain Humble, always Willing to Learn and Grow.

Where to Find Leaders

Leaders can be found in many places – you just need to know where to look. They might be in your community, in your workplace, or even online. Here are a few places to start:

• Networking Events: Attend events where Like-Minded people gather to Share Ideas, Learn, and Grow. Look for people who are Actively Engaged in the Conversation and who are Passionate about what they do.
• Membership Programs: Seek out Membership Communities where you can Connect with People who have the Experience and Wisdom to Guide you on your Journey.
• Social Media: While social media is often Filled with Superficial Content, there are also many Leaders who use these Platforms to Inspire and Educate. Look for Accounts that Provide Value, which Challenge your Thinking, and that Align with Your Values.
• Books and Podcasts: Many Leaders share their Knowledge and Experiences through Books, Podcasts, and other forms of Media. Find Content that Resonates with you and dive in.

#5 – Becoming a Leader Yourself

It’s not just about finding Leaders – it’s about becoming one. You have the Power to be a Leader in your own life and in the lives of others.

Leadership isn’t about being perfect; it’s about being Authentic, Showing Up Every Day with Intention, and Making a Positive Impact on Those Around you.

How to Develop Your Leadership Skills

• Know Your Values: Understand what you stand for and what matters most to you. Your Values will guide Tour Decisions and Actions as a Leader.
• Practice Self-Reflection: Regularly take time to reflect on your Thoughts, Actions, and Experiences. This will help you learn and grow as a Leader.
• Be Authentic: Don’t try to be someone you’re not. Embrace your True Self and lead from a place of Authenticity and Integrity.
• Empower Others: Leadership isn’t about Controlling Others; it’s about Empowering them to Reach their Full Potential. Focus on Lifting Others Up and Helping them Succeed.
• Take Responsibility: A Leader takes Responsibility for their Actions and Decisions. They don’t blame others or make excuses – they own their mistakes and learn from them.
• Stay Committed: Leadership requires Dedication and Persistence. Stay Committed to your Vision and your Goals, even when the going gets tough.

#6 – The Impact of Leadership on Manifestation

Here’s where it all ties together – Leadership and Manifestation go hand in hand. When you step into your role as a Leader, you raise your Energy Frequency and align yourself with the Universal Laws. You’re no longer just Wishing for Things to Happen; You’re Actively Creating the Reality You Desire.

Leadership and the Law of Attraction

The Law of Attraction states that Like Attracts Like. When you Embody the Qualities of a Leader – Confidence, Integrity, and Purpose – You Attract similar Energy into Your Life. You’ll start to notice that the People, Opportunities, and Experiences you Encounter are in Alignment with Your Goals and Values. This is the Power of Manifestation in Action.

Leadership and the Law of Karma

The Law of Karma teaches us that every Action has a Consequence. As a Leader, the Actions You Take, the Energy you Put Out, and the Impact You Make Will Come Back to You, often Multiplied. When you lead with Kindness, Compassion, and Integrity, you create Positive Karma that will benefit you in the long run.

Manifesting the Life You Desire

When you Surround yourself with Leaders and Become a Leader yourself, you’re Actively participating in the Creation of your Life. You’re no longer a Passive Observer – you’re a Powerful Co-creator with the Universe. By Aligning Your Actions, Thoughts, and Energy with your Desires, you can Manifest the life you truly want.

#7 – Overcoming the Fear of Leadership

If you’ve been Hurt in the Past, especially by Narcissists or Toxic People, the idea of Stepping into a Leadership role might feel Intimidating. You might Fear Judgment, Rejection, or Failure. But here’s the thing – true Leaders are not Immune to fear; they just don’t let it stop them. They feel the fear and do it anyway. And so can you.

Facing Your Fears

The first step to Overcoming fear is to Acknowledge it. Don’t push it away or pretend it doesn’t exist. Instead, sit with it, understand it, and then decide to move forward despite it. Remember, fear is just a Sign that you’re Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone, which is Exactly where Growth happens.

Building Confidence

Confidence comes from taking Action. The more you step into your Leadership role, the More Confident you’ll Become. Start small – take on a Leadership Role in a Small Project, Speak Up in a Meeting, or Mentor Someone who Could use Your Guidance. Each step you take will build your Confidence and Reinforce your Belief in your Abilities.

Embracing Vulnerability

Being a Leader doesn’t mean you have to have it all together all the time.

In fact, one of the most Powerful aspects of Leadership is Vulnerability. When you allow yourself to be Vulnerable, you Show others that it’s Okay to be Human, to make Mistakes, and to Ask for Help. This Creates a Culture of Openness and Trust, which is Essential for True Leadership.

#8 – Your Path to Leadership

By now, I hope you see the Power and Potential of shifting your Focus from followers to Leaders. When you Stop Chasing after Superficial Validation and instead, Invest Your Time and Energy in Building Meaningful Connections with Leaders, Your Life will Transform in Ways You Never Imagined. You’ll find that You’re More Fulfilled, more Empowered, and more in Alignment with Your True Purpose.

Remember, Leadership isn’t about being perfect – it’s about being Authentic, Showing Up Every Day with Intention, and Making a Positive Impact on those around you. It’s about Empowering Others, Lifting Them Up, and Creating a Ripple Effect of Positive Change.

So, Stop Searching for followers. Start Searching for Leaders. And Most Importantly, become the Leader you were always meant to be. The World is Waiting for you to Step Into your Power – don’t Keep it Waiting Any Longer.

Where there is a will, there is a way.

And you, my dear, have the will. Now go out there and lead with Confidence, Courage, and Love. The Universe has Your Back, and your Tribe of Leaders is Ready to Walk Alongside You on this Journey.